Image by Bich Tran – http://www.pexels.com
Dare to Create – a survivor’s story & their top tips on moving forward
Hello readers, and welcome to another Dare You Create article from #ProjectLifeQuality. Your creative corner, where we discuss our topic of the week and you are provided with a suggestion to take away with you.
This will be something designed to encourage, and motivate you to explore your thoughts through the use of the arts.
Dare to Create
Good morning folks. Welcome to January, the month to review what we’ve learnt from the past year and give ourselves the fresh start we deserve.
Will 2018 be the year of dramatic changes for you?
Even small adjustments can be a powerful catalyst.
Today it’s a privilege to share with you the message of one survivor, who’s recovery just goes to show that abuse does not define you.
Image – http://www.pexels.com
Before this week’s inspiring interviewee shares their experience of overcoming trauma and finding self-awareness, let’s take a look at today’s creative prompt. I know how much you look forward to this, so here it is.
Dare to Create – the challenge
Sometimes we need to ask ourselves what would make us happier
or even remind ourselves that we’re allowed to be happy.
Do you need to give your head and heart some attention?
Is it time to draw the line and set some goals?
Some things to ask yourself
- Is there anything you miss doing?
- Do you want to learn something new?
- Do you want to make new friendships?
- Do you want a job?
- Do you want to go traveling or exploring?
- What do you want your life to be like, five years from today?
Image bottom left – http://www.pixel.com
PLQ would love to see your creativity and messages, so please don’t forget to tag us!
Some readers may find the content of the
following discussion disturbing.
This week’s survivor story
Allow me to introduce Yakara Tahboub. A survivor who’s blog and Instagram posts have gathered much admiration and appreciation.
Yakara – “Because I had early experiences with abuse, I sought men that were abusive. I thought that I did not deserve better. My relationship never got to the point of physical abuse, but there was a lot of psychological abuse, a lot of power imbalance, codependency, extreme jealousy and control. I wasn’t even aware that this was happening, I didn’t see the patterns of my choices until I started therapy and began to gain some knowledge, self-esteem, and self-worth.”
PLQ – “What would you say to someone who wanted to make a fresh start but felt there was nothing they could do to change things?”
Yakara – “Changing our situation (even when the situation is bad) is very scary. It is normal for people to fear the unknown. Change is often painful, but it is only through change that we can fully live. I would tell that person that he/she deserves goodness, as much as anyone else in this world, and I truly believe that any human being that has experienced any kind of abuse, has the strength to survive it, and to thrive. The first step is the hardest one, but it is worth it. I would tell them to consider themselves living and not just surviving.
The happiness that awaits them is so much bigger and powerful than the pain that they fear. I would also tell them that I took that step, and there’s nothing special about me. I am just like them. If I can do it, they can do it too.”
PLQ – “What helps you through the worst days, Yakara?”
Yakara – “I don’t want to keep feeling like that. I don’t want to cry myself to sleep or be scared anymore. I refuse to live in pain and fear. I tell myself that it is enough. I remind myself that I deserve more… something beautiful. I deserve to live and not just survive.
I also have many healthy coping tools that I immediately go to. I see my dog, I drink tea, I get my grounding object, I call a friend, I watch Lilo & Stitch, I write in my journal…. I’m always actively and consciously choosing to heal and use these positive coping techniques I learned in therapy.”
PLQ – “What are your thoughts on self-care?”
Yakara – “Self-care is my best friend. It’s crucial for me to be constantly aware of engaging in self-care behavior. Self-care means so many things for me. Sometimes it’s taking a break from work, or a nap, or talking to a friend, meditation, going out for a walk. It’s not always easy to engage in self-care behavior. Sometimes I forget, and end up having a relapse. I asked my closest friends to remind me of self-care when it seems like I have forgotten about it. I also leave myself notes reminding me to take time for myself. It’s definitely crucial and whenever I engage in self-care behavior, it’s when I feel best.
Thank you for sharing with us Yakara.
To explore more of Yakara’s wisdom, visit http://www.myinfiniteserenity.com or her Instagram account – @myinfiniteserenity .
Be the person you want to be!
PLQ Creative Coach and Journalist